You know it's a wild week when something else trumps iPhone drama

Public transport turns deadly

Seems like it’s getting more dangerous to ride the bus each day. Protruding staples were discovered in the seat of a bus service 240 last Tuesday (Oct 31), when a polytechnic student had her hand cut and bloodied by a seemingly harmless seat. She had placed her right hand on the seat when steadying herself to alight, but felt sharp pains immediately, before realizing there were four metal staples embedded into the seat. The SBS Transit bus has since been recalled for investigation, and it hasn’t been confirmed whether the incident was a prank similar in nature to the toothpick terror that happened back in August. But with the trains breaking down and the buses filled with safety hazards, it appears the only reliable mode of transport left is walking.

Nasi lemak appreciation goes too far

On Oct 31, Malaysia beauty queen Samantha Katie James unveiled a nasi lemak-inspired dress that was, sadly, not a brilliant Halloween get-up. The costume, created by fashion designer Brian Khoo, is to be worn as James’ national costume in the 66th Miss Universe pageant final, to represent and depict “the uniqueness of Malaysia”. But it wasn’t the sequined cucumber slices and egg, or even the curiously displayed ikan bilis ornamentation, that got us perplexed—rather, it was Khoo’s confident statement that “nasi lemak is a dish that can only be found in Malaysia”. Sure, we’ll give credit where it’s due to the iconic dish originating from across the border, but over-defensive much?

Queue mania

It was a week of hot drops in Somerset—first, the Erdem x H&M collection on Thursday (Nov 3), and then the iPhone X on Friday (Nov 4). Naturally, that meant long queues at ungodly hours the day before each launch. 120 people stood in line outside H&M’s flagship store at Orchard Building before doors to the coveted floral-printed collaboration opened at 8am. Apple fans, of course, took it many notches higher, with hundreds camping overnight for the 8am iPhone X launch. Some even came prepared with sleeping bags and luggage to tide them through the extremely ridiculous wait. Honestly people, it’s just a phone.

ByePhone X

Hours after said ridiculous wait outside the Apple store, a Singaporean man dropped the brand new iPhone X he’d queued over 16 hours for onto the train tracks at Dhoby Ghaut MRT station. He had queued overnight from 7pm the day before and, fatigued from the wait (who wouldn’t be?), accidentally let slip of the $1,888 phone through the platform gap. The phone has since been retrieved and returned to him—and unscathed, thanks to a $54 phone case that padded the phone’s perilous fall. If there is one lesson to be learned here, it’s not to skimp when investing in your phone case, folks.

SMRT gives us the year’s biggest blockbuster

In a multi-part saga not unlike the conspiracy thrillers of Hollywood, SMRT dropped the year’s biggest revelations that sent citizens into a frenzy of disillusioned paranoia. The surfacing of doctored maintenance records, an amnesty period for staff to come forward and confess, and a massive internal inspection hilariously named Operation Osprey (an osprey is a predatory hawk)—all we’re missing here is a Sherlock Holmes-meets-Tom Cruise type to spill the dirt and save the day. And while the questioning of SMRT’s company and maintenance culture is itself a deeply troubling issue, who said nothing ever happens in Singapore?